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Have you ever prayed for patience? What happens next is the whole day seems to go awry and we get more frustrated. But, that is exactly what we prayed for.
Jesus isn't in the business of waving a wand and fixing things and we would do well to remember that. When we ask our Lord to help us with something He will, very often, give us situations and tools to help us grow and be a better person.
I will share a story with you that happened to me Friday. I went to the chapel at the hospital I work at and I sat quietly and began to clear my mind from all the days activity.
I finally cleared my mind and prayed a rosary. My intentions were my usual petitions and thanksgiving, and I added one that has been weighing on my heart for a few weeks.
You see when your heart begins to churn it's best to ask for the Divine assistance instead of haphazardly jumping into a decision.
I prayed for Jesus to help me understand a situation I am currently in and then steer my life to the part of the vineyard that I am needed in.
Well, after about an hour I finished and sat silent for a while and meditated on the Agony in the Garden.
I remembered that my spiritual director and long time friend celebrated his first mass in the chapel (over 50 years prior) I was in, so, I stood up, genuflected, and kissed the relic in the altar, and asked "Pete" to help me.
This is where it gets weird. I was putting the books back and the phone began to ring in the sacristy as I was writing a note for the priest scheduled for mass that day.
I remember hearing this voice in my head say "Answer the phone" I ignored it and kept writing. The phone kept ringing and so I finally answered it.
"Hello, this is the chapel", I said. There was no answer, except the open line with a breathing that was not abnormal.
I repeated, "Hello, this is the chapel." Same response.
I repeated a third time, "Hello, this is the chapel." Nothing but the breathing and an open line.
I hung the phone up and the priest that was scheduled to celebrate mass walked in. I told father what happened and he said, "probably a wrong number". I agreed and we had a brief conversation and I left.
I was walking away and I began to laugh. You see, "Pete" and I were extremely connected, in fact, he once told me that few people understood him like I did, which brought tears to my eyes. But what I was laughing about was these type of things have happened all my life and I always discounted them as "nothing" until I met Pete.
I took them more serious and this was one of those situations. I have heard that one way the "dead" can connect or communicate with the "living" is by the same means that I experienced with the phone call.
A call, and I answered except I didn't get any invitation orders, or requests, just a breath, ruach.
The point is that phone call, the small still voice that instructed me to answer the phone, my reluctance to answer the phone, and the breathing on he other side is something that led me to meditation.
Peter was asked three times by Jesus, "Do you love Me?" and I connected that to the phone call.
Here is the kicker, one of the conversations that I had with Pete before he died dealt with him telling me that he would always be with me. I never doubted that because I feel him closer to me than ever before.
That phone call was no accident or coincidence, it was a message. Jesus heard me and Pete let me know. he is with me. (Sound schizophrenic? well so does prayer and talking with a spirit, the saints, and angels, so don't judge.)
Lent is a wonderful time of our liturgical year to go deeper in faith and trust Christ is with us and in my moments of doubt, he made it clear.
This antiphon from evening prayer tonight says it all and we should pay close attention to the meaning and each word, "Call upon the Lord and he will hear you; cry out and he will answer: Here I am."
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