The thought of an apology can bring about the fear that we will be viewed as weak and our stubbornness can overtake us.
When we talk about forgiveness we talk about a state of peacefulness. The road to forgive may be one that brings up the harshest and most painful memories we have, yet until we take that step to forgive the people that hurt us, we can never be still in that peace.
I'll give you a personal example;
There is a person that befriended me and I thought that this person was sincere and open. What I found out later was the person used the vulnerability to gain power over me.
I didn't have many friends and was new to the area and a bit out of place to say the least. The person began to ask me questions that I felt were sincere so I responded honestly.
Time passed by and it wasn't until I stopped by the theatre to say, "Hi" to my professor that the person really disappointed me.
The rehearsal was going on so I stopped to watch. I heard this person yell (Randomly and loudly) an insult that applied to what they thought was appropriate.
I remember tears rapidly approaching and I needed to just leave. I went to my car and cried. I went home that day thinking that everyone sucked. I thought that everyone was fake and really only talked to me because I was someone that they could joke about.
The person may not know that I heard the words that came from their mouth, but I remembered.
The very next day I was early for a class and a young lady sat next to me and said; "Rob, thanks for being my friend." I remember this because I was having an anxiety attack and her words calmed me, instantly. A few minutes later the guy walked in, and that was the day I forgave him. I realized that his immaturity is what was at the base of the remarks. My friend told me that you will always encounter liars and fakes, but love them any way.Forgiveness comes from a very special place and that place is peaceful and loving. "Forgive them Father, they know not what they do."
Forgiven.
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